Maintaining Sanity

My Mom sent this to me and I’m not sure where she found it and I assume she sent it because I am still job searching without a job.  I’ll be glad to give credit where credit is due if someone knows the source of this.  

The funny thing to me is I think I’ve done most of these.  I’m not sure my Mom realizes it.  Also. it’s important to remember the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.


How To Maintain A  Level Of Insanity:

1.   At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars.  See if they slow down.

2.   Page yourself over the intercom.  Don’t disguise your voice!

3.   Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

4.   Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks.  Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

5.  In the memo field of all your checks, write “for marijuana”

6.   Finish all your sentences with “In accordance with the prophecy.”

7.   Skip down the hall rather than walk and see how many looks you get.

8.   Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face

9.   Specify that your drive-through order is “To Go.”

10.   Sing along with the opera.

11.  Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.

12.   Five days in advance, tell your friends you can’t attend their party because you have a headache.

13.   When the money comes out of the ATM, scream, “I Won!  I Won!”

14.   When leaving the Zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling.





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